Download 8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty: A Guide to Finding, Keeping, and Letting Go of Love
Introduction
Love is one of the most powerful and universal human experiences. Yet, nobody sits us down and teaches us how to love. So were often thrown into relationships with nothing but romance movies and pop culture to help us muddle through. Until now.
If you're looking for a practical, insightful, and inspiring guide to every stage of romance, you need to download 8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty. In this book, the author of the #1 New York Times bestseller Think Like a Monk offers a revelatory guide to finding, keeping, and letting go of love, drawing on ancient wisdom and new science.
download 8 rules of love by jay shetty
In this article, we'll tell you who Jay Shetty is and why you should listen to him, what 8 Rules of Love is and what you can learn from it, and how you can download 8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty. We'll also give you a brief overview of each rule and how you can apply it to your own love life. Let's get started!
Who is Jay Shetty and why should you listen to him?
Jay Shetty is a storyteller, podcaster, and former monk. He is on a mission to make wisdom go viral. He has created over 400 viral videos with over 5 billion views, and hosts the #1 Health and Wellness podcast in the world, On What is 8 Rules of Love and what can you learn from it?
8 Rules of Love is a book by Jay Shetty that reveals the secrets of finding, keeping, and letting go of love. It is based on his own personal journey as well as his extensive research and interviews with experts and couples from different cultures and backgrounds.
In this book, you will learn:
How to cultivate self-awareness and self-love before entering a relationship
How to avoid falling in love with potential and accept people as they are
How to communicate with clarity and compassion in your relationship
How to grow together, not apart, with your partner
How to balance passion and practicality in your relationship
How to heal from your past and break free from unhealthy patterns
How to respect yourself and your partner in your relationship
How to know when to stay and when to walk away from a relationship
By following these 8 rules, you will be able to create a fulfilling, lasting, and healthy relationship with yourself and others. You will also be able to cope with the inevitable challenges and changes that come with love. Whether you're single, dating, married, or divorced, this book will help you navigate the complex and beautiful world of love.
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How can you download 8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty?
If you're interested in downloading 8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty, you have several options. You can:
Download the e-book version from Amazon Kindle, Apple Books, Google Play Books, or other online platforms.
Download the audiobook version from Audible, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or other online platforms.
Download the PDF version from Jay Shetty's official website or other online platforms.
No matter which option you choose, you will be able to access the book anytime, anywhere, and on any device. You will also be able to enjoy the benefits of digital reading, such as highlighting, bookmarking, annotating, and sharing. Plus, you will save money, time, and space by downloading the book instead of buying a physical copy.
To download 8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty, simply follow these steps:
Choose your preferred format (e-book, audiobook, or PDF).
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Create an account or log in to your existing account on the platform.
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Select the book and click on the download button.
Enjoy reading or listening to the book!
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Rule 1: Know Yourself Before You Know Someone Else
The first rule of love is to know yourself before you know someone else. This means that you need to cultivate self-awareness and self-love before entering a relationship. Why? Because if you don't know who you are, what you want, and what you deserve, you won't be able to find someone who matches your values, needs, and preferences. You will also risk losing yourself in a relationship or settling for less than you deserve.
Why self-awareness is the foundation of love
Jay Shetty defines self-awareness as "the ability to see yourself clearly and objectively through reflection and introspection". Self-awareness is essential for love because it helps you:
Understand your strengths and weaknesses
Acknowledge your emotions and triggers
Identify your passions and purposes
Determine your goals and aspirations
Evaluate your beliefs and values
By knowing these aspects of yourself, you will be able to attract someone who complements you, supports you, and respects you. You will also be able to communicate your expectations and boundaries clearly and confidently. And most importantly, you will be able to love yourself unconditionally and authentically.
How to discover your values, needs, and preferences
To discover your values, needs, and preferences in a relationship, Jay Shetty suggests doing some exercises topic. They hide their phone or social media from you.
They are selfish and manipulative. They don't care about your feelings or needs. They use you for their own benefit or pleasure. They guilt-trip you or gaslight you into doing what they want.
They are disrespectful and abusive. They don't treat you with kindness or consideration. They insult you, criticize you, or put you down. They control you, isolate you, or harm you physically or emotionally.
If you notice any of these signs in your partner, you should be wary of their intentions and motives. You should also ask yourself if you are truly happy and fulfilled in the relationship, or if you are just holding on to a false hope or a fantasy.
How to set healthy boundaries and standards in a relationship
One of the ways to avoid falling in love with potential is to set healthy boundaries and standards in a relationship. Boundaries are the limits that you set for yourself and others in terms of what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior. Standards are the expectations that you have for yourself and others in terms of what is desirable and undesirable quality. By setting boundaries and standards, you are protecting your self-respect, dignity, and well-being in a relationship.
To set healthy boundaries and standards in a relationship, Jay Shetty advises you to:
Be clear about what you want and need in a relationship. Don't settle for less than what you deserve or desire.
Be assertive about what you will and won't tolerate in a relationship. Don't let anyone cross your boundaries or violate your standards.
Be consistent and firm about enforcing your boundaries and standards. Don't make excuses or exceptions for anyone who disrespects or disappoints you.
By doing these things, you will be able to attract someone who respects and meets your boundaries and standards. You will also be able to avoid someone who tries to change or undermine them.
Rule 3: Communicate with Clarity and Compassion
The third rule of love is to communicate with clarity and compassion in your relationship. This means that you need to express your feelings, thoughts, and expectations effectively and listen actively and empathetically to your partner. Why? Because communication is the key to understanding and intimacy in a relationship. Without communication, you will have misunderstandings, conflicts, and disconnection.
Why communication is the key to understanding and intimacy
Jay Shetty explains that communication is the bridge that connects two people in a relationship. Communication is essential for understanding and intimacy because it helps you:
Share your emotions, opinions, and experiences with your partner
Learn about your partner's emotions, opinions, and experiences
Negotiate your differences and resolve your issues with your partner
Express your appreciation and affection for your partner
Build trust, respect, and rapport with your partner
By communicating effectively, you will be able to create a deeper bond with your partner. You will also be able to avoid unnecessary conflicts and enhance your satisfaction and happiness in the relationship.
How to express your feelings, thoughts, and expectations effectively
To express your feelings, thoughts, and expectations effectively in a relationship, Jay Shetty suggests using the following tips:
Use "I" statements instead of "you" statements. For example, say "I feel hurt when you ignore me" instead of "You always ignore me". This way, you avoid blaming or accusing your partner and focus on your own feelings.
Use specific examples instead of generalizations. For example, say "I appreciate it when you help me with the dishes" instead of "You're so helpful". This way, you give concrete feedback to your partner and show them what they did well.
Use positive language instead of negative language. For example, say "I would like us to spend more time together" instead of "You never spend time with me". This way, you avoid criticizing or complaining to your partner and express your desires constructively.
By using these tips, you will be able to communicate your feelings, thoughts, and expectations clearly and respectfully to your partner. You will also be able to elicit a positive response from them and encourage them to listen to you.
How to listen actively and empathetically to your partner
To listen actively and empathetically to your partner in a relationship, Jay Shetty suggests using the following tips:
Pay attention to what they are saying and how they are saying it. Observe their body language, tone of voice , and facial expressions. Try to understand their perspective and emotions.
Ask open-ended questions and clarifying questions. For example, ask "How do you feel about that?" or "What do you mean by that?". This way, you show your interest and curiosity in what they are saying and encourage them to elaborate.
Reflect back what they are saying and feeling. For example, say "So you're saying that..." or "It sounds like you're feeling...". This way, you check your understanding and show your empathy for what they are saying and feeling.
By using these tips, you will be able to listen actively and empathetically to your partner. You will also be able to make them feel heard, understood, and valued in the relationship.
Rule 4: Grow Together, Not Apart
The fourth rule of love is to grow together, not apart, with your partner. This means that you need to support your partner's goals and dreams and deal with challenges and changes as a team. Why? Because compatibility is not enough for a lasting relationship. You also need to have a shared vision and a common purpose in your relationship. Without growth, you will stagnate, drift apart, or outgrow each other.
Why compatibility is not enough for a lasting relationship
Jay Shetty explains that compatibility is the degree of similarity or harmony between two people in a relationship. Compatibility is important for a lasting relationship because it helps you:
Enjoy each other's company and have fun together
Understand each other's preferences and habits
Agree on most things and avoid conflicts
Trust each other and feel comfortable with each other
However, compatibility is not enough for a lasting relationship because it doesn't guarantee growth. Growth is the process of change or development that occurs in a relationship. Growth is essential for a lasting relationship because it helps you:
Learn new things and have new experiences together
Challenge each other and inspire each other
Adapt to changing circumstances and overcome obstacles together
Fulfill your potential and achieve your goals together
By growing together, you will be able to create a dynamic, exciting, and meaningful relationship with your partner. You will also be able to avoid boredom, resentment, and dissatisfaction in the relationship.
How to support your partner's goals and dreams
To support your partner's goals and dreams in a relationship, Jay Shetty suggests doing the following things:
Show interest and curiosity in your partner's passions and pursuits. Ask them about their plans, progress, and challenges. Listen attentively and offer encouragement.
Celebrate their achievements and successes. Congratulate them, praise them, or reward them for reaching their milestones or accomplishing their tasks. Share their joy and pride.
Provide help and guidance when needed. Offer your advice, feedback, or suggestions when they ask for it or when they are stuck. Share your resources, contacts, or skills when they need it or when they can benefit from it.
Respect their autonomy and space. Don't interfere with their decisions or actions unless they are harmful or unethical. Don't pressure them or nag them to do things your way or at your pace. Don't distract them or interrupt them when they are focused or busy.
By doing these things, you will be able to support your partner's goals and dreams in a relationship. You will also be able to show your love, respect, and appreciation for your partner.
How to deal with challenges and changes as a team
To deal with challenges and changes as a team in a relationship, Jay Shetty suggests doing the following things:
Acknowledge the reality of the situation and its impact on both of you. Don't deny, minimize, or exaggerate the problem or its consequences. Don't blame yourself or your partner for the situation.
Communicate openly and honestly about your feelings, thoughts, and expectations regarding the situation. Don't hide, suppress, or avoid your emotions or opinions. Don't assume or guess what your partner is feeling or thinking.
Negotiate a solution that works for both of you and aligns with your values and goals. Don't impose your solution or accept their solution without discussion. Don't compromise on something that is important or essential for either of you.
Take action together to implement the solution and monitor the results. Don't procrastinate or hesitate to act on the solution. Don't ignore or neglect the feedback or outcomes of the solution.
</ Support each other emotionally and practically throughout the process. Don't criticize, judge, or belittle each other for their feelings, thoughts, or actions. Don't withdraw, isolate, or distance yourself from each other.
By doing these things, you will be able to deal with challenges and changes as a team in a relationship. You will also be able to strengthen your bond, trust, and resilience as a couple.
Rule 5: Balance Passion and Practicality
The fifth rule of love is to balance passion and practicality in your relationship. This means that you need to keep the spark alive in your relationship and manage your finances, responsibilities, and expectations as a couple. Why? Because love is not just a feeling, but a choice and a skill. You need to nurture both the emotional and the rational aspects of your relationship. Without passion, you will lose the excitement, attraction, and romance in your relationship. Without practicality, you will face the stress, conflict, and hardship in your relationship.
Why love is not just a feeling, but a choice and a skill
Jay Shetty explains that love is not just a feeling, but a choice and a skill. Love is not something that happens to you, but something that you create and maintain. Love is not something that is constant and stable, but something that fluctuates and evolves. Love is not something that is easy and effortless, but something that requires work and dedication.
To love someone is to choose them every day, despite their flaws and imperfections. To love someone is to learn how to communicate, compromise, and collaborate with them. To love someone is to work on yourself and your relationship continuously.
By treating love as a choice and a skill, you will be able to cultivate a deeper, more mature, and more lasting relationship with your partner. You will also be able to overcome the challenges and changes that come with love.
How to keep the spark alive in your relationship
To keep the spark alive in your relationship, Jay Shetty suggests doing the following things:
Express your appreciation and admiration for your partner regularly. Don't take them for granted or assume they know how you feel. Tell them what you love about them and what they mean to you.
Surprise your partner with small gestures of affection and attention. Don't fall into a routine or become predictable. Do something unexpected or spontaneous for them or with them.
Explore new things and have new experiences with your partner. Don't get stuck in a rut or become bored. Try something different or adventurous with them or for them.
Flirt with your partner and keep the sexual tension high. Don't lose the attraction or the romance. Tease them, touch them, or seduce them.
By doing these things, you will be able to keep the spark alive in your relationship. You will also be able to maintain the passion, excitement, and fun in your relationship.
How to manage your finances, responsibilities, and expectations as a couple
To manage your finances, responsibilities, and expectations as a couple, Jay Shetty suggests doing the following things:
Have open and honest conversations about your money matters. Don't hide, lie, or avoid talking about your income, expenses, debts, savings, or goals. Share your financial situation and plans with each other.
Create a realistic and fair budget and stick to it. Don't overspend, undersave, or waste money on unnecessary things. Plan your spending and saving together and track your progress.
Distribute your household chores and duties equally. Don't expect one person to do everything or nothing at all. Divide your tasks according to your abilities and preferences and help each other out.
Align your expectations and goals as a couple. Don't assume, guess, or impose what you want or need from each other. Discuss your hopes, fears, and dreams with each other.
By doing these things, you will be able to manage your finances, responsibilities, and expectations as a couple. You will also be able to avoid stress, conflict, and resentment in your relationship.
Rule 6: Learn from Your Past, Don't Live in It
The sixth rule of love is to learn from your past, don't live in it. This means that you need to heal from your previous hurts and traumas before entering a new relationship and break free from unhealthy patterns and habits in your love life. Why? Because your past can affect your present and future in a negative way. If you don't heal from your past, you will carry the baggage of pain, anger, fear, or guilt into your new relationship. If you don't break free from your past, you will repeat the same mistakes, choices, or behaviors in your new relationship.
Why you should heal from your previous hurts and traumas before entering a new relationship
Jay Shetty explains that healing from your previous hurts and traumas before entering a new relationship is crucial for your well-being and happiness. Healing from your past helps you:
Release the negative emotions and memories that are holding you back or hurting you
Restore your self-esteem and self-worth that have been damaged or diminished by others
Reclaim your power and control over your life that have been lost or taken away by others
Reconnect with your true self and identity that have been hidden or changed by others
By healing from your past, you will be able to enter a new relationship with a clean slate and a fresh start. You will also be able to attract someone who is healthy, positive, and supportive for you.
How to forgive yourself and others for past mistakes
To forgive yourself and others for past mistakes in your love life, Jay Shetty suggests doing the following things:
Acknowledge the mistake and its impact on you and others. Don't deny, minimize, or justify the mistake or its consequences. Don't blame yourself or others for the mistake.
Understand the reasons and motivations behind the mistake. Don't judge, condemn, or hate yourself or others for the mistake. Don't assume or guess what yourself or others were thinking or feeling.
Express your remorse and apology for the mistake. Don't hide, avoid, or ignore the mistake or its effects. Don't expect or demand forgiveness from yourself or others.
Learn from the mistake and make amends if possible. Don't repeat the mistake or make excuses for it. Don't ignore or neglect the lessons or opportunities that the mistake offers.
By doing these things, you will be able to forgive yourself and others for past mistakes in your love life. You will also be able to move on with peace, grace, and wisdom.
How to break free from unhealthy patterns and habits in your love life
To break free from unhealthy patterns and habits in your love life, Jay Shetty suggests doing the following things:
Identify the patterns and habits that are harming you or your relationship. Don't ignore, deny, or rationalize them. Don't think that they are normal or inevitable.
Analyze the causes and consequences of the patterns and habits. Don't blame yourself or others for them. Don't think that they are permanent or unchangeable.
Replace the patterns and habits with healthier ones. Don't give up on yourself or your relationship. Don't think that it is too late or too hard to change.
Seek help and support if needed. Don't isolate yourself or suffer alone. Don't think that you are weak or unworthy of help.
By doing these things, you will be able to break free from unhealthy patterns and habits in your love life. You will also be able to create a happier, healthier, and more fulfilling relationship with yourself and others.
Rule 7: Respect Yourself and Your Partner
The seventh rule of love is to respect yourself and your partner in your relationship. This means that you need to show respect through your words and actions in your relationship. Why? Because respect is the cornerstone of trust and loyalty in a relationship. Without respect, you will have contempt, betrayal, and abuse in your relationship.
Why respect is the cornerstone of trust and loyalty in a relationship
Jay Shetty explains that respect is the act of honoring and valuing yourself and your partner in a relationship. Respect is the cornerstone of trust and loyalty in a relationship because it helps you:
Build confidence and security in yourself and your partner
Avoid dishonesty and infidelity in yourself and your partner
Prevent resentment and hostility in yourself and your partner
Foster appreciation and gratitude in yourself and your partner
By respecting yourself and your partner, you will be able to create a strong, stable, and harmonious relationship with your partner. You will also be able to avoid the pain, damage, and loss that come with disrespect.
How to show respect through your words and actions
To show respect through your words and actions in a relationship, Jay Shetty suggests doing the following things:
Speak kindly and politely to your partner. Don't use harsh, rude, or abusive language. Don't insult, mock, or curse at your partner.
Act considerately and generously to your partner. Don't be selfish, stingy, or mean. Don't ignore, neglect, or hurt your partner.
Listen attentively and attentively to your partner. Don't interrupt, dismiss, or contradict your partner. Don't assume, judge, or criticize your partner.
Support positively and constructively to your partner. Don't discourage, undermine, or sabotage your partner. Don't compete, compare, or envy your partner.
By doing these things, you will be able to show respect through your words and actions in a relationship. You will also be able to receive respect from your partner and enhance your mutual respect.
How to handle conflicts and disagreements respectfully
To handle conflicts and disagreements respectfully in a relationship, Jay Shetty suggests doing the following things:
Acknowledge the difference of opinion or perspective and its validity. Don't deny, invalidate, or dismiss the other person's point of view. Don't think that you are right and they are wrong.
Understand the reason or motivation behind the conflict or disagreement. Don't attribute negative intentions or motives to the other person. Don't think that they are trying to hurt you or oppose you.
Express your feelings and thoughts calmly and clearly. Don't let your emotions get the best of you or cloud your judgment. Don't think that you have to win the argument or prove your point.
Seek a solution that is fair and beneficial for both parties. Don't insist on your way or refuse to compromise. Don't think that you have to lose or sacrifice something for the sake of peace.
By doing these things, you will be able to handle conflicts and disagreements respectfully in a relationship. You will also be able to resolve them effectively and peacefully.
Rule 8: Know When to Stay and When to Walk Away
The eighth rule of love is to know when to stay and when to walk away from a relationship. This means that you need to never settle for less than you deserve in a relationship and recognize the signs of a toxic or abusive relationship. Why? Because you deserve to be happy, healthy, and safe in a relationship. You also deserve to be with someone who loves, respects, and supports you. Without these things, you will suffer, struggle, and lose yourself in a relationship.
Why you should never settle for less than you deserve in a relationship
Jay Shetty explains that settling for less than you deserve in a relationship is a form of self-sabotage. Self-sabotage is when you act against your own best interests or goals. When you settle for less than you deserve in a relationship, you are sabotaging your own happiness and well-being. You are also sabotaging your own potential and growth.
This can happen for several reasons:
You have low self-esteem and self-worth. You don't believe that you are worthy or capable of having a better relationship. You think that this is the best you can get or that you don't deserve more.
You have unrealistic expectations and standards. You have an idealized image of what a perfect relationship should look like or feel like. You think that no one can meet your criteria or that you can't find anyone better.
You have fear of change or loss. You are afraid of leaving your comfort zone or facing the unknown. You think that staying in a bad relationship is better than being alone or starting over.
To avoid settling for less than you deserve in a relationship, Jay Shetty suggests that you:
Boost your self-esteem and self-worth. Recognize your strengths and achievements. Appreciate your uniqueness and value. Love yourself unconditionally and authentically.
Adjust your expectations and standards. Be realistic and flexible about what you want and need in a relationship. Be open and curious about different people and possibilities.
Overcome your fear of change or loss. Embrace your challenges and opportunities. Trust yourself and your intuition. Love yourself enough to let go of what doesn't serve you.
By doing these things, you will be able to never settle for less than you deserve in a relationship. You will also be able to find someone who matches your worth and fulfills your needs.
How to recognize the signs of a toxic or abusive relationship
Sometimes, it can be hard to tell if your relationship is toxic or abusive. Jay Shetty warns that there are some signs that indicate that your relationship is unhealthy or harmful for you. These signs include:
Your partner is controlling and possessive. They tell you what to do, where to go, who to see, what to wear, etc. They monitor your phone, social media, or whereabouts. They isolate you from your friends, family, or support system.
Your partner is disrespectful and abusive. They treat you with contempt, disdain, or indifference. They insult you, mock you, or humiliate you. They hit you, push you, or hurt you physically or emotionally.
Your partner is dishonest and unfaithful. They lie to you, cheat on you, or betray you. They hide things from you, break promises to you, or take advantage of you.
Your partner is negative and unsupportive. They criticize you, undermine you, or sabotage you. They discourage you, belittle you, or envy you. They ignore you, neglect you, or reject you.
If you notice any of these signs in your relationship, you should be alarmed and concerned for your safety and well-being. You should also ask yourself if you are truly happy and healthy in the relationship, or if you are just afraid or attached to it.
How to end a relationship gracefully and move on with dignity
If you decide to end a relationship that is toxic or abusive, Jay Shetty suggests doing the following things:
Be clear and firm about your decision and reasons. Don't be vague, ambiguous, or indecisive. Don't let your partner persuade you or guilt-trip you into staying.
Be respectful and compassionate about your partner's feelings and reactions. Don't be cruel, harsh, or insensitive. Don't blame them or insult them for the breakup.
Be prepared and safe for the consequences and challenges. Don't be naive, careless, or reckless. Don't put yourself or others in danger or harm.
Be supportive and positive about yourself and your future. Don't be depressed, hopeless, or bitter. Don't dwell on the past or regret your choice.
By doing these things, you will be able to end a relationship gracefully and move on with dignity. You will also be able to heal from the breakup and find new love and happiness.
Conclusion
In conclusion, 8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty is a book that reveals the secrets of finding, keeping, and letting go of love. It is based on the author's personal journey as well as his extensive research and interviews with experts and couples from different cultures and backgrounds.
In this book, you will learn how to:
Know yourself before you know someone else
Don't fall in love with potential
Communicate with clarity and compassion
Grow together, not apart
Balance passion and practicality
Learn from your past, don't live in it
Respect yourself and your partner
Know when to stay and when to walk away
By following these 8 rules, you will be able to create a fulfilling, lasting, and healthy relationship with yourself and others. You will also be able to cope with the inevitable challenges and changes that come with love.
If you're interested in downloading 8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty, you can choose from various formats and platforms, such as e-book, audiobook, or PDF. You can also visit Jay Shetty's official website or follow him on social media for more wisdom and inspiration.
We hope that this article has given you a helpful overview of 8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty and how you can apply it to your own love life. Thank you for reading!
Frequently Asked Questions
Here are some frequently asked questions about 8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty:
When was 8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty published?
8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty was published on February 14th, 2023 by HarperCollins Publishers.
How long is 8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty?
8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty is 320 pages long in the paperback edition and 10 hours long in the audiobook edition.
Who is the target audience for 8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty?
8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty is suitable for anyone who is interested in learning more about love, relationships, and self-improvement. Whether you're single, dating, married, or divorced, this book will help you navigate the complex and beautiful world of love.
What are some other books by Jay Shetty?
Jay Shetty is also the author of Think Like a Monk: Train Your Mind for Peace and Purpose Every Day, which was published in 2020 and became a #1 New York Times bestseller. He is also working on his third book, which will be released in 2024.
Where can I find more information about Jay Shetty?
You can find more information about Jay Shetty on his official website, jayshetty.me, where you can access his blog, podcast, videos, courses, and events. You can also follow him on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, and LinkedIn, where he posts daily wisdom and inspiration.
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